Created and sent via e-mail August 2nd.......
Dear Family and Friends,
EDITORS NOTE:
I've been trying and trying and trying to get this note out to all of you, doing it bit by bit. I AGAIN find myself sending out a new journal entry the NIGHT BEFORE a very important day in my journey. Monday morning at 10:00 I am consulting with the Radiation Oncologist. While I'm anxious and nervous, I must be prepared for what he might have to say. Be assured that I will be and I will take his recommendation for treatment. As much as I've not looked forward to this over the past 3+weeks of my post-surgery recovery, I know the day is here and necessary as I take further steps to recover.
So for GOOD LUCK...I again send out a journal update the night before a BIG DAY. Below please find my medical update that I've did bit by bit over the 2+ weeks of recovery. ENJOY!!!
Welcome back to the journal of the David D Cancer Journey. Volume #5. Yes I have taken about a 2+ week hiatus from this as I was going and going and going......it was time my body and my mind wanted to just shut it down over the past 2+ weeks.
YES it has been a while since I last corresponded. YES I've got BIG news to share. YES I've got so much else to tell that has been built up in my simple mind over the past 2+ weeks since I last wrote and updated all of you. But for today, I just wanted to update all of you on the status of the medical end of my journey........and of course, let's keep the good news coming!!!
Without a doubt I've hopefully just gotten through the most traumatic 48 days of my life---Friday May 28th being my initial visit to the EENT which got all of this rolling until my follow up visit on July 14th. I wanted to update all of you on my doctor's follow up visit from July 14th. This is where I last left off in my writing, putting out a journal entry the night before for good luck as writing the night before both surgeries seemed to be lucky for me. So as I said before, let's see if the the 3rd time could be a charm........and WOW was it!!!!!!!
My follow up was to review my pathology from the 2 surgeries, discuss radiation/chemo treatment moving forward and while I was there, hopefully get my lovely drainage tubes and staples removed. Surely Grace my home nurse was hoping for those drainage tubes to come out........but NOT AS MUCH AS I DID!!! Well before I saw the doctor, the nurse came in first. After hello the first words out of her mouth are......"isn't it great that you don't need radiation". And in one of those extremely rare times that my mouth is open and either words are not coming out or food or beer not going in, I'm like.....HUH? She noted that my reaction was one of not jumping up and down for joy, but utter disbelief and she was correct. Prior to this, everything I was told was that 2 treatments of 3 were needed to help eradicate the cancer. Pick any combo of the 2, of Surgery, Radiation, Chemo. All medical folks agreed that at least 2 of the 3 forms of treatment were absolutely needed. Sometimes all 3 were needed, but never, never, never just 1 of them.
So while I'm in disbelief over that, the fun is gonna begin and this lovely woman turns from nice mild-mannered nurse to the ultimate pain inflicter. So the tubes are gonna come out first and then the staples. So now I know when someone says......."I've never had this done to me, but people tell me it just burns"....Well that should have been almost as believeable as a woman telling a man that she knows what it feels like to get kicked in the nuts. JUST BURNS......just burns my ass, just burns!!! So next I get........"Count to 3, hold your breath and I'm gonna yank them out".....Seriously, now does the America Medical Association ever publish a proper procedure where the word YANK is used in medical performance? So I know, this ain't gonna be good for old Davey boy. In the span of about 2 minutes and 3-4 sentences this nurse has made me completely forget about the positive possibility of not needing radiation.
Well incredibly Tube #1 did just that it burned.....for about 5 seconds before the not so comfortable pain set in. After a few minutes, it was time for Tube #2. And hopefully I'll live to be 100 and if I do.....just the thought of Tube #2 will give me the chills and goosebumps. I will say, she did "warn me" that the 2nd tube was the longest and furthest into my skin. That didn't matter. She YANKED that thing out and I screamed like Mel Gibson on those RadarOnline tapes screaming at the Russian ex-girlfriend. Not sure, but I think a little old lady from Delaware called to complain about the noise. Holy Lord save me from that pain again. I literally thought she ripped my Adam's Apple out. So when the screaming was done, then it was time for the 49 1/2 yr old man to start crying like I was a 11/2 yr old. You ever want me to stop dead in my tracks, just say......"Hey Dave, remember Tube #2"?......
OK, so I call time out, make a call to the bullpen, take 2 Percosets and then relax for a few before we decide to move on to Tube #3 and oh yeah, the 23 staples as well.
So now my new BFF Dr. Weinstein comes in and gets a nice chuckle out of my "tube adventure" and what are his first words after hello...you got it......"You don't need radiation. There are NO traces of cancer in your body". Yes even though the nurse said no radiation, my utter disbelief continues and now to an even greater degree because the doctor has so forcefully said to me, NO cancer in my body. My thought right then and as I told Grace on the way home........'How can on June 15th I find out I have cancer in 2 parts of my body and maybe more........and go from that to you have NOT even TRACES of cancer just 30 days later"?....again I was stunned.
So the doctor proceeded to tell me that the margins around both surgical areas of tumor removal---tonsil and neck---are clear of any traces of cancer. I was (and still am) more worried about the neck tumor more, mostly due to the facts of the robotic surgery and smaller size of the tonsil tumor seemed to much easier to clean out that tumor completely. But the neck one worried me more. The doctor tells me they removed 65 other nodes and all are clear of cancer. GREAT NEWS all of to this point and even one more morsel of GREAT NEWS........NO CHEMO. Based on the success of surgery, negative margins and lack of cancer in any of the nodes, Chemo is an ABSOLUTE NO. Personally, this one did put a smile on my face and allowed me a deep exhale. I would have and will do anything going forward I have to do to fight the fight and win the battle, but I had a goal of beating this without Chemo. For now, I've had success on the Chemo end, but what about the radiation thing???............
But surely you know it never seems to be 100% of great news. Looking at the Pathology further and speaking with the Pathologist while I was there, it seems the neck tumor was actually significantly much larger---like 68% significantly larger---than what was originally discovered on my scan. It was measured at 2.5cm on my scan prior to surgery and pathology post-surgery recorded it at 4.2cm. That size of tumor is alarming. Now the scan took place on June 11th, but to grow that much by July 6th is virtually impossible. So this is of a concern to the doctor and of course, more troubling to me.
So while mostly all of the news was GREAT NEWS and the diagnosis short-term and long-term are good, my doctor suggested to have Monday's consultation. As I noted earlier, I always believed 2 therapies would be needed for full eradication and recovery. For me, it was going to be surgery and radiation, so I was fully prepared for this process. The doctor felt the consultation and possible treatment would allow me to cover all bases. Good or bad, I am now in the driver's seat for the time being on how I want to treat myself. It some ways that is what makes tomorrow's consultation scary for me and why in some ways I've dreaded the day. If I choose correctly life is easy. If I choose wrongly---I know myself---I'll be torturing myself through second-guessing as long as I can imagine.
But less than 12 hours from now, I'll probably know what I am doing for my short-term cure that will impact my long-term survival. I'll do my best to update all of you on what will be in store for me. Until then.....
Oh yeah and BTW........almost forgot. After the 2 percosets, taking out Tube #3 and 23 staples.......a piece of cake!!!
Be Well and God Bless,
David D
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